“The Tax Song”
English Translation
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Note: This German/English text is provided for language-learning purposes only. No infringement of the original copyright is implied or intended. The English prose translation is by Hyde Flippo.
English Translation: The words in (parentheses) indicate a double meaning in the German original that is difficult or impossible to translate into English. For example, the word Kröten means toads, but is also slang for pennies or money. Other idiomatic expressions (e.g., den Salat haben, to be in a fine mess) are translated in their idiomatic, rather than their literal sense.
The Tax Song - Las Kanzlern - English
That's really great, people: Just when we need a little more dough from you for Cousin State, that's when we're about as popular as athlete's foot. But all I want is your best - your money!
Dog tax, tobacco tax,
motor vehicle and environmental tax.
Did you really think there wouldn't be more?
Sales and beverage taxes
do certainly make a beer expensive,
but that's still not enough for me!
Well you went and elected me
and now you're in a fine mess!
Once again I'm your chancellor for a few more years!
What you can promise today,
you can take back tomorrow,
and that's why I'm collecting every last banknote -
your cash, your moolah, your piggy bank!
Chorus
I'm raising your taxes.
Elected is elected, you can't fire me now;
that's really the cool thing about democracy.
I'm digging deep into your pocket,
every one of you nerds is stashing some dough somewhere
and I'll get it, I'll find it - no matter where it is.
I'm taking you for everything - yeah! You losers!
You'll be amazed, because I know how to keep surprising you.
Oh, there's not a tax I can't think up! Ha, ha, ha!
For example we could consider a bad weather tax, right? That would really bring in the dough! Or a sleeping tax for you bums, or a hair dye tax... uh, no, better not!
A tax on the use of the earth's surface,
a breathing surcharge, air will be expensive,
and I'm just getting started!
A tooth tarif for chewing your food,
bio taxes for digestion,
there's nothing that will be free - that won't do!
I'm a fantastic politician.
Quality has its price.
Anyone who wants to see the Gerd Show will have to pay, too!
Like an income pirate I'm at the helm.
When you fall on hard times, just shop more often at
Lidl or Penny Markt or Aldi... or buy nothing at all!
Chorus
I'm raising your taxes.
Elected is elected... (See above)
Saving on taxes (driving) is quite simple. For example I have a chauffeur so I can can save on (avoid) driving. By the way, do you know the difference between me and a lobster? The lobster turns red when it's boiled (when it fleeces someone). Ha, ha, ha!
Attention! Attention! My dear fellow citizens! Soon there will be another big migration of toads (pennies). The pennies (toads) will go directly from your pocket into mine. Ha, ha, ha! But the unemployed - one could surely squeeze something out of them; there's so many of them.
DEUTSCH > Der Steuersong
Im Wahlkampf vor mir liegt ein Zonenmädchen
Another German parody from "Tax Song" creator Elmar Brandt. This 2005 satire pokes fun at the two chancellor candidates Gerhard Schröder (SPD) and Angela Merkel (CDU/CSU).
MORE OF THIS FEATURE
Deutsche Version
The German text of “Der Steuersong.”
Der Steuersong - Part 1
Part One of this article on “The Tax Song.”
ON THE WEB
Die Gerd-Show
The official German site for the radio show by Elmar Brandt. See the video, hear the song! (RealVideo/Audio) Learn more about Die Gerd-Show. (in German)
Der Kanzler SinG(K)t
New CD album version of Die Gerd-Show. Preorder this CD from Amazon.de, scheduled for Dec. 2 release.
Der Steuersong
Die Maxi-CD kann man bei Amazon.de bestellen.
The Ketchup Song (Asereje)
Die Maxi-CD von Las Ketchup kann man auch bei Amazon.de bestellen.
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